Did you all have a lovely holiday season? I hope so. Did you watch the Golden Globes, or at the very least follow my amazing drunk live tweets of it? Well, Lena Dunham won for her portrayal of Hannah Horvath on Girls, and the show won for Best TV Series (Comedy or Musical). All of this happening while Girls premiered its second season. So let’s get to it. Oh, and on a side note, I’m not nearly as hung over as I’d predicted.
Episode 1: It's About Time
Hannah—Her boyfriend Adam got hit by a truck, and she kind of lost it. Ate cake on Coney Island.
Shoshanna—Being deflowered by acquaintance Ray. Also smoked crack.
Jessa—Got married to a man she barely knows, but it’s Chris O’Dowd from Bridesmaids, so I can’t really blame her.
Marnie—lost her mind at Jessa’s hippie wedding, made out with that one guy from SNL in front of her ex. Charlie.
Everyone's having a great morning! Hannah and her new roommate, Elijah, wake up spooning in bed together. But it’s fine; Elijah’s gay, he just doesn’t have a bed yet. “Sorry I have a boner, it’s not for you.” Also, they keep saying they’re the best roommates ever.
Shoshanna is cleansing her room with sage, wishing for the higher powers to “ruin Ray’s life.” Trouble in paradise? And Marnie goes to lunch with her boss, who informs her she’s been “downsized” (aka fired).
Later, she has lunch with her mom (a very Real Housewives-looking Rita Wilson), who tells Marnie all about the cater-waiter she’s screwing. “Sometimes you need a pair of rough hands on your body,” she says to her daughter’s disgust. Marnie tries to talk to her mom about her troubles, but mom is more concerned with telling her daughter she looks like she’s 30, not eating and trying to be Marnie’s “friend.” Then they both drink more wine.
Hannah fucks Donald Glover while Regina Spektor plays in the background. Nice. Also, I don’t recall Donald’s character’s name, so he will be herein referred to as “Donnie.” They run around a bookstore and act all new-coupley. Hannah tells Donnie she doesn’t want to hear talk about love; from now on she’s going to make logical, responsible decisions. Donnie keenly observes that this is all about...
Adam. Yes, Hannah is playing nursemaid to her ex, who’s leg is in a cast after the whole “getting hit by a truck” thing. He’s all sorts of cranky, probably because Hannah is wearing the ugliest pair of acid wash denim shorts that I have ever seen.
But really, it’s more about Hannah wanting to figure out their relationship (read: she doesn’t want to be in a relationship with him), and Adam lets her know if she doesn’t want to define things, that’s cool. And then he lays down this bombshell “When you love someone, you don’t have to be nice all the time.” She sits back down with him, and her body language screams “This relationship is suffocating me but I’m too nice to leave.” Haven’t we all been there? Next morning, Hannah helps Adam pee in a pot. And to think she doesn’t want to stay.
Later, her and Elijah get ready for their party. They talk about how great living with each other is, and how they should have parties all the time. “All your nights can’t be food nights,” Elijah says. But you know what, I beg to differ! He says he’d like to do some kind of Gertrude Stein/Midnight in Paris/Squeaky Fromme party. They both giggle at how amazing it is to be roommates. I can’t imagine this will end well.
Shoshanna shows up early dressed as a 1920s ballerina. She rambles on about how she’s totally over Ray (she’s not). “I’ve been deflowered, not devalued.” Shoshanna is quickly becoming my favorite character aside from Hannah. And her excruciating karaoke is painful and hilarious to watch.
She has an encounter with Ray while she searches for something amongst the bags and purses. It’s one of the most adorable fights ever. They kiss and make up, and spill beer all over everyone’s stuff.
Elsewhere, Marnie and Charlie have an awkward series of conversations all night. Charlie’s girlfriend is so over everything. Plus she’s dressed like a Native American Olivia Newton-John in the “Let’s Get Physical” video, so that might be where all the bitchiness is coming from.
Marnie and Hannah have a quick pow-wow (see what I did there?) about their friendship. They seem farther apart. Hannah chalks it up to her working all the time, plus her new job of playing nursemaid to Adam. But the conversation is cut short when Elijah barges in. His boyfriend, George, is drunk and will not get the fuck out. George also threw some major shade at all the tragic hipsters at the party for being totally dull. It’s true. Hannah comes to the rescue—sort of—by taking George outside, and just as he says how sweet Hannah is, she runs inside and locks him out.
After the party’s over Elijah and Marnie sing “Building a Mystery,” (excellent choice). And talk about George and Charlie and sex. It leads Marnie to confess “I could never be a gay man, I hate giving blowjobs [of course you don’t] and having anal sex...I assume.” Elijah confesses that maybe he’s bisexual? They make out and get naked. Elijah tries to stick it in her but can’t get it up. He notices her roll her eyes (and she does, I watched it twice), and it’s downhill from there.
Later, Marnie finds comfort in the arms of Charlie. They might or might not have sex.
After the unpleasantness with George, Hannah swings by Adam’s to drop off supplies. She’s tired of this whole mess of a relationship, she essentially says. Adam doesn’t understand after all the amazing times they had—he made her whole body feel like a clit, after all—that she’s suddenly over it. “I’d die if you go away,” he says as I stifle a cringe. Hannah, cut the cord, honey. Also, that motherfucker has crutches. Why does he need Hannah to do everything for him? Enabling, am I rite?
|No, I'm totally right.|
“Can I borrow The Fountainhead?” Hannah asks Donnie as she walks into his apartment, drops her dress and bra and falls onto his bed. Super-hot ending to a super-hot season premiere.
Episode 1: The Key
Did you know Laura Dern won the same Golden Globe last year for her performance of Amy Jellicoe? It's true! So maybe now that it's on after Girls, it will get the viewers and recognition that if deserves. And I know what you’re all thinking “But Kurt, Laura Dern is so unlikable in this show. It’s not haha funny, it makes me uncomfortable. I don’t like to watch TV shows that make me think and that have ambiguous, realistic characters.” Well, my friends, you’ve come to the wrong recap, then.
Last season, Amy got a hold of the email accounts of the Abaddonn executives. The premiere picks up soon after. Amy has had a glimpse of the dark inner workings of her company. “What if this kingdom really is cursed?” Her voice narrates. “What if you knew how to break the spell?”
The next morning, Amy talks to her mother about fate. She doesn’t believe in it, but Amy does: “sword in the rock” fate. Amy also takes an article out of the paper featuring a journalist she has her eye on, but won’t go into specifics. She leaves for work in her still busted up car.
She talks with her poor, put upon co-worker Tyler about all the horrible things she read the other night. Apparently the executives are awful people. She wants Tyler to help her take the company down, but he really, really doesn’t want any part of it. He let Amy use his password to hack into the accounts in the first place. She also tells him about Jeff Flender, a journalist specializing in exposing the tyranny of capitalism and corporate greed.
During their lunch break, Amy calls Jeff’s office and leaves a voicemail. She also drops a bombshell on Tyler: Abaddonn is shutting down Cogentiva (that’s where they work). Till then, Tyler wasn’t too concerned with Amy’s passion for justice. He decides to help her again.
At the office, Amy gets a call from Jeff Flender (Dermot Mulroney, looking good, might I add) and they set up a meeting at TGIFridays for that evening.
Later, Amy and Tyler tell their creepy boss that they’re working late, but really they’re printing out all the awful corporate correspondences. Until the power goes off. Then they freak out, grab all they’ve printed out and head for the door. They have a hilarious encounter with security as well.
Amy takes all the info with her to her meeting with Jeff. I can’t help but laugh at the thought of having a clandestine meeting at TGIFridays. Anyhoo, Jeff seems intrigued but also a little worried at how crazy Amy is. She’s kind of a live wire. Regardless, he says he’ll look over her information and get back to her. Yeah, right.
Imagine my surprise when he actually does call her back the next day. Totally thought he was going to blow her off. He wants to meet again, but this time at his place in LA. Amy knows her car won’t make the drive, so she pleads with Tyler to drive her out there (apparently Riverside and LA are far away? I have no idea). He’s hesitant, but ultimately agrees.
They park, and Amy tells Tyler to wait in the car. What a jerk! She meets with Jeff, and he doesn’t think there’s much of a story in nasty emails. Amy’s incensed, and even moreso when he asks about her revenge plot. She goes to leave, but he thinks there might be an even bigger story at Abaddonn. Paying off govt officials
Back in the car, she tells Tyler that Abaddonn is paying off government officials, and with their help, Jeff can take them down. Tyler doesn’t want any part of it.
And here is one of the many reasons I love this show. Amy gives an impassioned speech to Tyler about how she felt alive, and she felt like somebody doing something important, and not just dying. I can’t really do justice to it; go watch it for yourselves. The episode ends with Amy’s lovely narration. “No kingdom lasts forever.”
So, it’s funny in a weird way how Girls and Enlightened are similar. Aren’t they both shows about people wanting to be something? And to figure out their place in the world? Maybe that’s why I’m so drawn to each show.
Anyhoo, I can’t wait for next week! See you then!