sup oscars!

I watched the annual Oscars in bits and pieces, flashes really. Like I was on a bus for a while then I was waiting for a cab then I was eating dinner but before that I was on said cab. So it was a lot going on, all at once.


Things That Happened


- The Artist sort of swept, playing hand-in-hand with Hugo. Honestly, I don't give a shit about Hugo. I rather watch Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close followed by ALL THE DOCUMENTARIES, FOREIGN FILMS AND LIVE ACTION SHORTS before I sit down to watch Hugo.


- Meryl Streep won. I'm a little sad by this, to be real with you. Part of me was pulling very hard for Michelle Williams as Marilyn Monroe. Oh well. I guess there are names some actresses in Hollywood know they will always lose against:  Kate Winslet and Meryl Streep.




- The dude from the Artist got best actor. Okay, great. But I still think Clooney or Pitt (aka MY BROS) could have easily gotten it instead.


- God, did Billy Crystal suck that much, or had I not taken enough sedatives? glug glug glug...cut your hair, Billy. it disturbs my SOUL.


- better hosts for next year:  Ellen or Steve Martin. Or Sarah Silverman....that would be a good time. NO BETTER YET THE CAST OF BRIDESMAIDS


- The Help:  I still don't care. Does this make me a shameful tiny person? yes. but. but. Emma Stone was one of the best parts of last night. Gorgeous and hilarious. A+


- did I stay up to watch the whole thing? HELL no


- Christopher Plummer winning his Oscar was one of the highlights of the evening. There were like, three highlights to this evening, you know.


- ANGELINA JOLIE IS AWESOME AND I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU SAY


Things  That I Wish Had Happened


- Bridesmaids
- Sarah Jessica Parker showing up on a double date with Lady Gaga
- The Muppets terrorist takeover
- Meryl dropping every cussword you can think of
- and I mean cussword
- Ryan Seacrest in tears
- Meryl Streep sending an American Indian to accept her award




Final thought:  someday, Glenn Close, your day will come.

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